To serve a cause
by Eilisande
Summary: The life of Ahsoka, between the fall of the Republic and the rise of the rebellion.


Translation of one of my texts. Enjoy you're reading and let me know if you liked it !

-.-.-.

Ahsoka Tano has lost many things over the years. Her innocence. Her master. Her friends. Kermen. Her friends. Her place in the Jedi order, then the order itself. But there is one thing she has never lost and it is the hope of a galaxy in peace, to finally see the end of the war. For her, the clone war never ended. Dooku is dead. The separatists have lost. But as long as Palpatine is in power, as long as clones serve him because it is their duty or because of their programming, as long as people applaud a dictator who walks in the dark side of the Force, as long as democracy is not restored, the war goes on. As long as there remains a person who's in charge by the emperor's will and abusing that power in his name, on any planet, the war will not be over. She even came to understand a sad truth: as long as there is only one victim alive, war is not over. Until her death, Ahsoka will hear the purr of lightsabers and the sound of blaster fire, she will smell burned droid circuits and burned bodies of soldiers.

No, the war is far from over.

Ahsoka Tano is called Kayti Kadawa and pretends to be a young professional player looking for a thrill on the first anniversary of the empire. Around her, people cheer and drink. It's not even that they support the emperor. They just listened too much of his propaganda of peace and goodness. They just want peace and Ahsoka cannot blame them for that. The whole galaxy was caught in the web of the Sith Lord and was devoured without protest. All the same, they should realize the danger. No one in the bar where she is sitting seems to realize how dark the galaxy has become. This is only the beginning of the empire, and it is already very dark.

Kayti Kadawa ostentatiously raises her glass and cheers with the others. Nobody realizes that her joy is artificial and that the hand holding the glass is shaking. The players, the staff, all drink their glasses with enthusiasm. Kayri Kadawa carries hers to her lips, but it is Ahsoka who empties it by toasting the memory of the missing and absent. She says the list to herself. Master Koon, killed by his men. Padmé, more than likely murdered by Palpatine. Rex, hidden somewhere in the outer edge and determined never to hear again about the galaxy that stole all his brothers. Master Kenobi, Master Yoda, alive but so well hidden that she would probably never see them again. Anakin ... She does not want to believe in his death but if he is not, he must be one of those unfortunate tortured by Dark Vader for fun. She heard the rumours.

In the mirror of the bar, Ahsoka identifies two men looking at her suspiciously before slipping away. It's time for her to run. Her name and her portrait are still on the list of wanted Jedi. When she was a child in the temple, she had promised herself to be a great Jedi, to serve the Force and bring a smile to the faces of all the children she would meet and help. As a teenager, she had promised herself that she would help stop the war and restore peace. By the end, she had lowered her ambitions and promised herself to save as many of her men as possible and help Anakin and master Kenobi as much as possible. Now she makes one last promise. She will survive Sidious and Vader.

Ahsoka Tano calls herself Yinti Deshwatu and works for a criminal syndicate when she is officially declared dead. It was four years after the advent of the Empire and three pirates and two bounty hunters saw the traitor Jedi throw herself into molten lava to avoid being captured. That's the advantage of working in the criminal community, you make interesting contacts. The kind of people who know how to traffic video surveillance cameras without asking questions or can get you the carbonized arm of young togruta woman taken from a freshly buried corpse. Then, all that remains to do is to suggest to these people that you never asked them to do that and that you have never been there. The witnesses respond sincerely to the representatives of the empire who came to question them. They are numerous. Rumour says that Darth Vader wanted to capture her alive. Ahsoka shivers when she learns it and sinks even deeper into the features of her character and into the depths of the criminal world.

Ahsoka learns to harden under the features of Yinti, even more so than during the war. She learns to compromise with her morality, and when you should refuse to cross the line anyway. She hates Yinti. This character reminds her of how easy it would be to fall into the dark side, give in to vengeance or decide that her survival is more important than the lives of those around her, even if they are vile criminals. For a long time, she saw Anakin struggling against the seduction of the dark side. At the time, she did not understand what was happening. Now she feels the darkness push around her, trying to sink her. It would be so easy. Many old Jedi and Padawan seem to have done so if the rumours about these Inquisitors are true. Maybe, if she gave in, she would not suffer so much each time she thought of all those she lost. Their death could become her victory over the Siths. Yinti shoots without hesitation in the head of a man who has displeased the one who pays her. He's a criminal, why should she have regrets?

Ahsoka Tano chooses the pseudonym Pilmi Saltwater when she decides to lay low for a while, nine years after the fall of the Republic. She left behind Yinti and her successive careers as a hacker, bodyguard and bounty hunter. Of this character, she kept only a few scars and her knowledge. The temptation of the dark side, she left behind her with dark memories.

The planet she chose is an agricultural world where many togruta live and Pilmi is greeted with kindness. They find her a room, they welcome her by the fire. Ahsoka realizes that she had forgotten what it was like to feel at home. The life these people lead is simple and quiet, their main concerns the next rain, the next harvest and the next hunt. Here, Ahsoka finds once again her link with the Force, as pure and simple as when she started to learn at the Temple. It does not sing, it's been a long time since the Force no longer sings, but it soothes Ahsoka. As she watches her garden the herds of the community grow, she realizes that if the balance is gone, nothing is lost. The Force is waiting for its time, preserving what can be preserved. The balance will be restored one day, just as the grass curled up under the ground in winter will come out in the spring. Just be patient.

Ahsoka learns patience. Master Kenobi would be amused to see that all these deaths and destructions were necessary for her to learn how to stay still and move with the rhythm of the plants. He always had a strange sense of humour. Meditation also helps, easier here than anywhere else where Ahsoka stepped in a dozen years and she comes to wonder if this is the will of the Force, to make her wait here. Maybe she's supposed to be like those plants, to hide now and then thrive when the balance is restored. She can wait fifteen years, twenty years, thirty years. Build a life.  
A man from the neighbouring village, a young togruta with blue and white montrals, propose to her. He is quite good looking, kind to everyone and caring with his flock. Ahsoka smiles, promises to think about it and spends more and more time with him. It's not hard to imagine them growing old together and raising children. They would be sensitive to the Force and devoid of all the prejudices and archaisms of the Jedi order, not warriors, but gardeners and healers. It's a future she can accept.

She is ready to leave the worries of the galaxy behind her since that is what the Force expects of her.

But, there are habits that Ahosoka Tano cannot lose and she has passed them on to Pilmi. Pilmi barricades her little house at night and never moves without a weapon to her belt. When a ship lands near the village to buy their goods and route them elsewhere in the galaxy, she always stands a short distance away in a threatening attitude. One evening, while the village is seated for a party, her almost-fiancé asks Pilmi why she is always armed.

"We're never too careful," Pilmi answers.

"But we risk nothing. The empire is there to protect us, what are you afraid of?"

Around them all who listen to the conversation nod, approving the young man. The empire flies over their heads. They are safe. Ahsoka waits a week before leaving, so as not to arouse suspicion.

Ahsoka Tano pretends to be Djen Kio No, wandering mechanic, while she travels the galaxy in search of answers. Instead, she finds questions. Men and women who disappear with their prodigious knowledge. The Empire came to fetch them, no one protests. Why? Children whose stuffed toys float over their cradle disappear during the night and are never spoken of again. Parents do not worry. Why? The dead are thousands on some planets, the aliens are increasingly discriminated against, the repression more and more brutal. The galaxy keeps its eyes down, why? What does it take for these people to realize that they are suffocating and applaud their killers?

Ahsoka listens and stays silent. Little by little, people start talking to Djen and Ahsoka learns to hear what is not said aloud, these novels written in silence at the end of the sentences. Suffering, fear and relief from not being targeted by the Empire for now. The sons forced to engage and the denunciations encouraged. The disruption of family ties because no one knows if the brother or mother will betray to protect themselves. Lassitude, which turns into acceptance. Passivity.  
One day, the people of the galaxy will be exhausted. Only that day will they think of revolting but it will be too late. Their resources and their youth will have been stolen and they will have no weapons to fight and no allies strong enough to help them. It is now that they should act, before the empire has insinuated itself into souls. Ahsoka would like to scream her conviction in every public place, but it would be silenced and they would forget this message, to be safe. You can not force a revolution. That does not mean that she has to give up hope.

Force tells her to be patient. Ahsoka thinks that being patient does not stop you from acting and she goes into action.

Ahsoka Tano is one and she is dozens. Djen Kio No, Pilmi Saltwater, Yinti Deshwatu, Kayti Kadawa, Trondi Keshto, Maj Nako, Sihoshka Nobi, smuggler, bounty hunter, mechanic, fruit seller, hacker, secretary, worker ... Dozens of identity and dozens of planets. Everywhere she looks, she listens and she thinks. She sees flaws and what Master Windu called breaking points. Some are not at this point yet but will be soon. Others may be, one day, if they are allowed to mature. If the Empire continues to suffocate peoples and planets.

The galaxy may not be ready for a rebellion, but when it will be, Ahsoka will be there to transmit the entry codes to the imperial factories, the locations of strategic points to sabotage, the names of missing people and those who can be convince, bribe or blackmail.  
She never stays long in the same place and tries to remain discreet. As a togruta, it is sometimes difficult. She stands out on many planets and imperial officers become so specious that it is more and more difficult to pretend to become their friends. She slips into the shadows, follows her prey when it is dark, uses special makeup to temporarily change the color of her skin or her facial patterns. Spy droids and window sills become her most intimate friends. She scarcely dares to sleep when she is on a mission, terrified of being captured, and that all her information will be lost forever to those who will succeed her in her task. She misses Rex terribly. Master Kenobi and Anakin too. She dreams of a friend on whom to rest, with whom to share her responsibilities. Sometimes she wakes up with a smile on her face thinking she's hearing a friendly voice, but she's alone, always alone. So she sends messages to Rex, which remain unanswered each time. He made his choice, the one she refused when she was Pilmi. There are days when she wants to be able to blame him, but she cannot. His choice is understandable, it's just that she misses him.

Twice, she finds herself too close, far too close to Darth Vader and is nearly killed. She does not use the Force, she is not desperate enough yet, but sooner or later they will suspect that Ahsoka Tano is not dead. The second time, she sees Vader fighting and realizes that his way of fighting is familiar. She knew him at the Temple, and if she can identify him, maybe she will find a way to reach him and taking him down. She also remembers the rumors that lingered a few years earlier. Dark Vadoir wants her alive. She begins to suspect something, something so frightful that she must confirm or deny it because it eat her up.

Too soon, exhaustion is a problem. She makes stupid mistakes, for lack of sleep, time and accomplices. The noose tightens on her but she cannot afford to give up what she does. One night, she is injured as she infiltrates a governor's office. It should be the routine, except that her reflex are dulled by the lack of sleep, she notices too late the guard who does his round, she cannot avoid three shots as she retreats. She escapes, narrowly, is injured by falling from the fifteenth floor through the window and spent the rest of the night putting patches of bacta on her back and legs. Soon it will be too much for her and she'll die. That's when the communicator of her ship starts to beep. Nobody knows that she uses this ship and she did not give its frequence to anyone.

Suspicious, she responds while engaging the takeoff procedure.

"Sihoshka Nobi?"

This is not the name she uses here. Bad sign. She stays quiet.

"Do I speak to Sihoshka Nobi? Nook Narod? Barsha Dealh?"

"Who ask for her?"

A long silence settles, then the interlocutor sights in relief.

"It's been months that we are trying to reach you. We believe you have information that interests us."

"And who are you?"

"Let's say you can call us the Resistance. And you, how should we call you?"

"Fulcrum."

A fulcrum. That's what she wanted to be and that's what she is, a point of support on which a rebellion can be build. What she was hoping for is finally here and Ahsoka cries silently after the end of this surrealist conversation. They found her. There are still good people ready to fight.

Ahsoka Tano is Fulcrum and she is no longer alone. There are now groups and cells, commanders, captains and even generals. There are stealthy encounters in sewers, information exchanges and desperate rescues. There is something incredible about seeing so many people stand up one after the other against tyranny. Some do not survive. Others, like Ahsoka, flourish there. This is the case of Hera, Kanan and many others. They share that spark and that unshakable conviction that makes her proud every time she sees it in the eyes of a rebel.

She has a purpose and a role now, people who follow her like the crew of the Ghost and others she follows with joy. Her path has often deviated since she left the Jedi order, but she has found some old friends on the way, like Rex or Senator Organa. Her lightsabers rest on her hips again. The inquisitors can chase after her and put her face on the list of survivors of the Jedi purge sought by the empire, so short now, she is no longer afraid to act in the open. Even the shadow of Darth Vader does not scare her anymore, even if she still fears to discover the face that hides under that mask. There is young Ezra and Leia - and really, do Senator Organa believes she doesn't know who her parents were? - who are the living promise of a Force fred from the dark side. Every time she sees them, Ahsoka knows she can die in the service of her cause. There will be others to continue the fights, the one she leads with a sword in her hand and the one she leads hidden in the shadows.

Ahsoka Tano is Fulcrum. Fulcrum is Ahsoka Tano but Fulcrum is much more. It's a name, a title, a message and an inheritance. Anyone can wear it and if she dies, she hopes many others will wear it after her. Tomorrow, Fulcrum will be a lasat, a twi'lek, a droid, a moff's wife, an imperial officer, a former separatist, anyone ready to go into the shadows to discover the secrets of the empire and send them through the depths of space to friendly ears, without certainty of success, but carried by the belief of doing what is right and the will to bring hope back to a galaxy that does not know no where to look for it.

Ahsoka is Fulcrum. She is in her place in the galaxy.


End file.
